Top 110 Corny Jokes That Are So Bad They Are Actually Funny Good
Prepare for some stupid jokes.
- What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
A funny corny joke
- Why did the bike fall over?
It was two tired.
A cheesy, corny joke.
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
- Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse.
- What did the policeman say to his belly button?
You’re under a vest.
- Why did the man get hit by a bike every day?
He was stuck in a vicious cycle.
- What did the bartender say to the turkey sandwich when it tried to order a beer?
“Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.
- What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other an oinkment.
- Why do people say “break a leg” when you go on stage?
Because every play has a cast.
- What do you call an alligator detective?
An investi-gator.
- What kind of ghost has the best hearing?
The eeriest.
- How did the dead brother and his dead brother resemble each other?
They were dead ringers.
- Why are there gates around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
- Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pen?
Because it’s pointless.
Related: Christmas Jokes
- Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
- Where can you buy soup in bulk?
The stock market.
- If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do elves get?
Mistle-toes.
- What’s brown and sticky?
A stick.
- What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her?
Namaste.
- How do you tell if a vampire is sick?
See if he is coffin.
- What do you call fake spaghetti?
An im-pasta.
- Why did the farmer win an award?
He was outstanding in his field.
- When do computers overheat?
When they need to vent.
- Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs.
- Why can’t your ear be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
- What do you call a factory that sells good products?
A satis-factory.
- What kind of music do planets like?
Neptunes.
- What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh.
- How do rabbits travel?
By hareplanes.
- What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race?
Ketchup.
- What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
- How do you stop a bull from charging?
Cancel its credit card.
- Why did the mushroom go to the party?
Because he was a fungi.
- Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
If it had four doors it would be called a chicken sedan.
- Have you heard about the corduroy pillow?
It’s making headlines!
- What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.
- What was the frog’s job at the hotel?
Bellhop.
- What do cows most like to read?
Cattle-logs.
- Why did the photo go to jail?
Because it was framed.
- What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino-snore.
- Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
For drizzle!
- Why did the restaurant hire a pig?
He was good at bacon.
- What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
- What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
- Why are the Irish so wealthy?
Because their capital is Dublin.
- What do lawyers wear to work?
Lawsuits.
- What has more lives than a cat?
A frog, because it croaks every day.
- What’s that restaurant on the moon like?
It doesn’t have atmosphere.
- What’s the best way to burn 1,000 calories?
Leave the pizza in the oven.
- What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer?
A father-in-law.
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
They crack up too easily.
- When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar.
- Why don’t you buy things with Velcro?
It’s a rip-off.
- Why did the robber jump in the shower?
He wanted to make a clean getaway.
- What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs?
A con descending.
- What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
- What do you call a row of rabbits hopping away?
A receding hare line.
- How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank his coffee before it was cool.
- Why did the kid stock up on yeast?
He wanted to make some dough.
- What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Reality.
- What kind of shoes do robbers wear?
Sneakers.
- What do you call a man that irons clothes?
Iron Man.
- Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?
He couldn’t see himself doing it.
- How did the barber win the race?
He knew a shortcut.
- What lights up a soccer stadium?
A soccer match.
- What kind of cheese isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese.
- Where does the electric cord go to shop?
An outlet mall.
- Why are frogs are so happy?
They eat whatever bugs them.
- Why don’t melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
Related: 250 Would You Rather Questions
- What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
Give me my quarterback.
- What did one hat say to the other?
You stay here. I’ll go on ahead.
- Why can’t you trust the king of the jungle?
Because he’s always lion.
- Why were the fish’s grades bad?
They were below sea level.
- Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
All of the fans left.
- What do you call banana peel shoes?
Slippers.
- What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.
- Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his snack?
He was shellfish.
- Why wouldn’t the poppy seed leave the casino?
He was on a roll.
- What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap music.
- What does corn say when it gets a compliment?
Aw shucks!
- Why did the robber jump in the tub?
He wanted to make a clean getaway.
- What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
- What did the elevator say when it sneezed?
I think I’m coming down with something.
- Why are elephants wrinkly?
Because you can’t iron them.
- Why couldn’t the pirate learn the alphabet?
Because he got lost at C.
- What did the ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It waved.
- How did the barber win the race?
He knew a shortcut.
- Why can’t you trust duck doctors?
They’re all quacks.
- What do you do with a sick boat?
Take it to the doc.
- What runs but never goes anywhere?
A fridge.
- What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain.
- Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.
- How does a duck buy lipstick?
She just puts it on her bill.
- What do horses say when they fall?
I can’t giddy up.
- How do you impress a baker?
Bring him flours.
- How does a rancher keep track of his cattle?
With a cow-culator.
- Which flowers are the best kissers?
Tu-lips.
- What do sprinters eat before they race?
Nothing. They fast.
- What did the cake say to the fork?
You want a piece of me?
- How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree?
By the bark.
Thanks for visiting Wishes for You